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Ask vs. Staying Silent


For much of my life, I was afraid to ask for things. I did not want to be needy or too much trouble, so I kept my feelings to myself. I wanted to be liked and was too accommodating to others. I remember the day my high-school boyfriend and I spent all day body surfing in the ocean without stopping for lunch. On the drive back, we stopped to get something to eat. Instead of asking if I wanted anything from the drive-through, he just ordered it for himself. I said nothing but was angry. I laugh at my younger self, yet I still act that way with God.

Even though God already knows what we want, we still need to ask. The Bible even states that, at times, asking is a prerequisite for receiving. (James 4:2 says, “You have not, because you ask not.”)


God cares about what we care about. He wants to give us the desires of our hearts. We do not need to pretend with God. He wants our goals, desires, fears, disappointments, and even our doubts. We all have desires which need to be communicated to the One who can actually do something about them. When we hold back, we limit intimacy. Vulnerability breeds connection. Having a voice is part of being in a relationship, and that is what God wants most.


God is trustworthy, so we can accept both His nos and yeses. He sees the whole picture, not just our tiny piece in it. It is, however, in our asking that we trust His perfect will and humbly surrender our desires for His.

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